The week that was :)

Aha, haven't chirped for quite some time. am back. haven't written a word since Diwali. so, here goes.....

So, on Diwali day i just met some friends for a chai and early dinner-hold on, after work . we meet at our usual desi restaurant very close to work-not a great one, but lets say we are used to each other.

but the most touching thing about that weekend was that i got a chance to talk to my brother-who's now a proud Dad. "wow, we are growing old"-he quips. Love that! yeah, sure.

and so life goes on-its another warm SoCal week in store. and i am just lazy so i don't blog at all. not lazy, just into my own world.....

one of my friends has been mentioning about another girl whom she met around her work place. and last week i finally met her. a nice person, very affable-we are from the same profession and there is a Delhi connection.....we chirp on about multiple things at our favorite hangout, munching on chhole and kulchas (folks, folks, don't go green in envy-this is not the kind of chhole-kulche taste that these very words invoke). after all, the chhole-kulche from a thele-wala (cart food-vendor) is beyond comparison.

and onto another weekend.....the week has gone by so quickly. i am always lazy on weekends to pack lunch to work-actually i have something like a brunch, so takes a while to go hungry again. and thats the thing, my dear. in the evening, you don't want to eat something substantial that would dim the chances of a great weekend dinner. so, i am hungry, just hoping to finish work and go home (fleeting thoughts of a great sandwich and cream of mushroom/broccoli soup from local deli, hot sambar and rice/rajma-chawal and planty many more goodies)

and thats exactly when i remember that i have to go to a friends place and from there to a function, with her. i reach her place and when i buzz the door-bell, she's on the phone with someone and insists that i talk to her, emphasizing that its a her she's talking to . i take the phone, and spend a few seconds guessing who it is.....thinking her to be another friend.....but i don't say much and then suddenly a flash ....."oh! how are you"-its a friend i recently caught up with (well, recent is a few months ago). and she's in another continent. we were together in Grad School. we catch up again, on lots of things.....my lovable host makes me a cpl. of crispy dosas because she's heard me (and my hunger pangs) scream on the phone a few hrs. back. BLISS :). i dig on the light and yummy food and then get up to make chai for both of us. we still chirp on with our friend on the phone and ask her if she wants her cuppa too.....

Diwali stories

Happy Diwali, everyone. I am sure you are all having a wonderful, colorful and a thunderous diwali :).

I just woke up-had real great dreams about Diwali.....Oo wow, all the phooljharis, chakris and anaars. As I call home, I can hear the sound of fire-crackers in the backdrop. and friends are writing from home abot what they are going to do for diwali. am I jealous ;) . what do I do for Diwali? ha, ha-go to the lab :) and go out for lunch.....

This year my family welcomes two new members: my nephew (brother’s son) and my niece (sister’s daughter). Their parents are a bit worried that the diwali dhoom might upset the lil’ ones.

And I am thinking about how I spent my Diwali last year-it wasn’t anything great, especially with the happenings in New Delhi. and I felt disgusted with one remark from an Asian colleague “Oh, they had such trouble for a festival, innocent people targeted-why? India is not an important country”. and I went all GRRRRRRRRRRRR. well, umm, not that loudly and rudely. but I challenged her to explain what she meant!! I turned out that she meant politically neutral and with her English not helping her enough she uttered the unsavory!

But, there’s one Diwali that’s very close to my heart. Boston, circa 2003.....

its a Diwali weekend-am back home after finishing a bit work in the lab. as I sip on some masala chai, the door-bell rings. Hmm, she’s home-my house-mate Arshiya. She looks at me and greets “Happy Diwali ji”-and I greet her back with the same. as I serve her some chai she quips “where are the lights”. and that makes me think, hmm, yes, its Diwali today. But then, am I supposed to celebrate this year.....Mom has left us for the heavens this year.....i think. I am quiet. and Arshi asks me, “kahan kho gayin aap”-i remind her that Mom is here no more. She smiles and hugs me and echos what goes on in my minds just as she hugs me. and we understand that my being happy and enjoying is only going to make Mom happier. She would actually not like it, if her child isn’t happy. I look up and break into a tearful grin and I hear my sweetheart Mom say “Chal uth, aiwayein na ro-ja uth ke kuchh kar. Aapni saheli naal bahar jaake aa” (”get up, don’t cry like this-go, do something-go out with your friend”). Thanks sweetie, I chirp, as Arshi looks on if its for her. She knows the answer.....and goes to set up the X’mas lights on the windows.

Dressed up, Arshi and I go out. Its quite chilly and we decide to walk upto the Bombay Cinema for a Hindi movie from our apartment in Brookline. I am told that theater no longer screens Hindi movies. On the way, we stop at Kashmir, an Indian store and buy some diyas and sweets. We pick up a coffee from Dunkin’-Donuts and buy a cpl of samosas after we reach the theater and get the tickets. The tickets are for “Pinjar”, a movie based on Punjabi writer Amrita Pritam’s novel by the same name. We anticipate a great movie as we both are Punjabis.....from the two sides of border. We munch on samosas while watching this movie that revolves around the story of a girl Puro, set in the turbulent times of India’s Partition. We are both a tearful shadow of ourselves, crying in bucketloads.....the movie ends and we both come out with a heavy heart and begin walking home. But as we walk, we feel lighter.....we laugh at this situation-an Indian and Pakistani girl watching and crying through this movie together. its a hindi movie like situation, we joke :).

We reach home, its another round of chai, this time with aloo-paranthas. We light the diyas and then sit and chat and within five minutes we realize we need some therapy.....we break into tearful grins again and pick up the casette for Chalte-Chalte and enjoy our beloved SRK dancing to “Gumshuda.....”

Darshan, embracing the baggage?

This morning i saw a trailer of the movie Darshan, The Embrace (L'etreinte) - there, its on my nerves again, have to talk about it.

Well, last month I got a chance to see this movie at a theater in Santa Monica. I have met Amma (courtesy one of my close friends) once while she was visiting Los Angeles this year. I found her to be very simple, child-like and innocent and her darshan means a warm embrace. She sits there the whole day, hugging people-all sorts of people. Amazing energy she has, she smiles all through, chit-chats with people around and doesn’t look a bit tired. She’s Amma (Mother in many Indian languages), lovingly so called because she hugs like a mother. And this was a movie about her, so I thought why not-must go and have a look.

Flashback: Its mid-September. A lil’ chilly in down-town Santa Monica. Hmm, its already 7:00 PM. I am a bit excited- a movie about an Indian saint here in US-lets see what its gotta say. Its a movie made by a Dutch guy, Jan Kounen. I am with a friend. We walk into the theater and take a seat. There aren’t too many people around, mostly her followers who’ve come to see the movie, hoping to see their beloved Amma. The movie begins with some vintage clips of Amma’s interaction with people who come to see her and then goes on to describe about “the hugging saint” a bit. The focus shifts to a young French woman, who’s come to see Amma. For next few minutes we are made to explore her spiritual journey, or so seems the aim of this footage. But, the camera just seems more interested in documenting empty corridors and even when it captures humans, its without much emotion and dialogue. In the latter few reels, we get to see the lush and beautiful Ashram in Kollam and few snippets of Amma. The movie then takes us to different cities (Calcutta, Benares and Jaipur) in India, where Amma goes to meet people. This is interspersed with Amma’s interaction with her devotees in Ashram. Its nice to see her dancing and singing, interacting with lil’ children, talking and even giving a part shy and part cute, but very sweet interview to the film-maker. The movie just sort of brushes on her charity work and her teachings, the former mainly in the form of footage from TV newscasts. There is also some beautiful old footage of Amma as a young girl on the swing and Amma doing Poojas-something sort of personal about the once lil’ girl, now a revered mother to millions. The movie concludes with a replay of the footage showing the young Amma on a swing. The movie is over and I am a bit disappointed, actually a bit off.....and I am just starting to tell this to my friend, who shares the feelings about the movie.

I hear someone say now, “whats your problem girl, with this movie?” Problem? I want to shout, No-I have PROBLEMS with the movie (and with some reviews too).....

As the movie progresses and takes us to different cities in India through Kounen’s camera, we are made to sit through footage that doesn’t necessarily focus on Amma or her energetic gatherings. There is a shot of a bus going to another city, and there multiple shots of hungry childrem in the slums in Calcutta, dust and grime-the cliche’ we are so used to seeing about India. And this goes on and on. Yes, there are slums in India-but how relevant is that to a movie about a saint. You know you are completely done when you see a carcass of a calf being consumed by maggots.....and that becomes the focus for a couple of minutes!! Pray, whats the relevance. and to top it all, as some touchy souls informed, its a calf.....In the whole of the conutry, all the film-maker finds is a dead livestock to focus on and disgust the audience. Or is he trying to convey something like “look, look-they worship cows and then leave them for maggots’ edification”. Worst, how does this become relevant to a documentary on the life and work of a motherly saint! Thankfully, the footage in Jaipur and Benares gets slightly better. The movie just has us taking a few glimpses of Amma and how she interacts with her devotees. Thankfully, it highlights her energetic presence and her wonderful gift of a hug to one and all. But, the movie doesn’t even explain the meaning and essence of Amma, the word and the persona. Instead of a film on a person and who she is, it merely follows her around and then mixes it up with irrelevant stuff and serves it to the audience. It doesn’t matter to a gora in the audience-hey have seen “India is poor, India is dirty” crap before. But it matters to me, an Indian-and where I come from-things just don’t look this way-its this and much more. Things could have been better.....If only Mr. Kounen had refrained from selling India’s poverty and instead focused on telling us more about Amma.

This agony is made worse when you see such irreverant stuff written in National Newpapers:

Quoting from http://movies2.nytimes.com/2006/07/26/movies/26dars.html

“Mr. Kounen, who is Dutch, wants everyone to share his captivation: watching the white-garbed faithful line up by the thousands for a smile and a cuddle, his camera is guilty of lingering on the faces of the beautiful. Abundant shots of lush foliage, pastel-toned rooftops and sizzling sunsets are also a far cry from the images of Indian deprivation we’re accustomed to seeing on the news.”

Another strange thing is the use of this song "Jab hum jawaan honge" from movie Betaab in the background whenever a young Amma is shown on the swing. I know it sort wants to tell us that this lil' girl will one day blossom into Amma. But given the context of the song, as we have seen in betaab, it sounds out of place. Besides, the movie doesn’t choose to tell us much about the charity work Amma does and even her hugs are presented as mere statistics. There is more to a hug than just numbers in my opinion, you'll know if you ever hugged anyone.....or may be I am being too harsh on Kounen.

Do I even need to say more-its Friday night-am just back from work and completely tired, so I guess i’ll take leave for now. May be I am over-reacting, may be not. Afterall, the guy has made this movie on a shoe-string budget and made a movie about an Indian mother, a woman who’s hugging millions and doing charity tirelessly-is that what I am expected to day (one more cliche’ and this takes the cake).

Happy Diwali and have fun.....

Who's the rat

Am back. to chirp about the movie i saw this Tuesday. if you've seen the movie already then the word 'rat' is hint enough to guess which one. yes, i am talking about "The Departed". i watched this movie for three different reasons: 1. its got three of my favorite actors (Jack Nicholson, Matt Damon and Leonardo DiCaprio). 2. Its set in Boston and i am in love with the city, having lived in the Brookline area. and 3. It was playing in the famed FOX theater in Westwood that i never stepped in before, because they rarely play movies that i want to watch.

So, the movie is about finding the rat-the mafia suspects that they got a rat and the Police 'the staties' think they got a rat too. and rats there are, aplenty. Even the ones you don't suspect might be rats. I would have personally liked the term "mole", now made famous by desi media. Jack Nicholson plays the don Frank Castello and as usual does the job too well. Matt Damon and Leonardo DiCaprio play the cops Sullivan and Castigan, respectively. Matt Damon is quite good, but show here belongs to DiCaprio, who lives the role. Martin Sheen plays Queenan, a fatherly chief of special unit and a perfect mellow foil in the movie to Nicholson's ruthless Castello. Mark Wahlberg is the abusive sergeant Dignam, really abusive and induces hate instantly-thats some performance too. Who's the bad cop-go, watch the movie. We also have Madolyn (Vera Farmiga), who is the department pyschiatrists and love interest to? umm, no spoiler, watch the movie.

Plenty of four-letter lingo, really plenty. do you want to get immunized for such language-its a must watch then ;). there is some unabashed use of racial-slur too. May be its there to make the stuff look more believable. and ah! how can we forget the corner convenience store-wallah desi guy. Though for a change he is not made to put on an un-authentic desi accent. it sounds more believably desi than most in recent past.

The movie can get a bit confusing towards the end, making you wonder "whats going on here"-but hold on, the last few scenes solve the mystery and you are good to go back home thinking that you didn't really waste time. All in all, a reasonable movie to go for.

Dada Dadi Ki Kahaniyan

Few days back i was playing with my friend's four years old when she just jumped into my lap and nudged me to tell her a goshto (a story/tale in Marathi). and i did, the story i had heard so many times, over and over again from my Mom and Grandmom.

And that took me down the memory lane..... the different stories, told and retold by the elders in the same wonderful style. the stories were told with masterly sound effects and perfect expressions, recreating the whole scene.....how vivid the imagery was-one could just see the cute kittens and rabbits, the mean wolf, the pretty princess, the graceful queen and a lot more right there.

Sitting in Grandma's lap and enjoying the warmth of her shawl's bukkal (bukkal: throwing one end of the shawl over the left shoulder, known as bukkal maarna in Punjabi) in the winters or just enjoying the gentle humming of her pankhi (hand fan) under the starlit sky in the summer , every night, i would enjoy countless tales of courage and bravery, beauty and riches.....she would tell stories and riddles or bujharataan/baatan on demand :). in her mock anger, she would say "i told this story even y'day", but i would go on requesting. there were many folk-tales about phool kumari, the queen and her maid-servants, the gith-muthiyas (mythic dwarfs who live in paataal-lok,meaning below the ground), jal-pari (the mermaid like mythic crature), panchtantra, Alif-laila, Bhagat Pooran ji, stories about the legendary warriors and saints, peers and faqeers, religious stories about Krishna ji, Ram Chandra ji and the Sikh Gurus. There were stories from her own times also-stories about Netaji, Shaheed Bhagat Singh, The World Wars and 1947. and whenever i would request her for a story during the day-time, she would say "you are not supposed to tell stories during the day-time. the travellers lose their way". sure, with such wonderful stories, they would!

Here are a few stories and i am glad that i found this link to share (God bless the people who compiled this).

I just mentioned about Punjabi tales, because thats where i come from. But our culture is a treasure-trove of such wonderful tales, in different languages.This tradition of narration and dramatic rendition is fading slowly. if you/ your elders have such tales to share, please come forward :). Lets hope that "Once upon a time" just doesn't become once upon a time.....

Shaadi ya.....

Many of you would have come across sporadic, strange marriage proposals from the shaadi-byah type web-sites or through other channels.

there are some who are probably (and you don't need to be a rocket-scientist to figure that out)sending the same mail to everybody: "hi, i am interested in your profile, if you are interested in mine, please contact me at :xyz@abc.com". there are some absent minded ones who don't care to leave even a contact address!

then there is another "DANDAman (guy with a danda/lathi)" breed: sample this gem"i love to dress well and exprect the same from my spouse (good so far) and if you are not into dressing well, i would have to take you for shopping to overhaul your wardrobe".

some male lurkers can be seen expecting their to-bes to be really "she should be taking care of herself well"-what does that mean? do you want her to be independent, i appreaciate that-but the following few sentences emphasising about manicures and pedicures suggest something else!

there are few who introduce by saying "i have a degree from a prestigious institute and am currently working at a fortune 500"-well if you are spending enough time to say this, then may we please know, where exactly!

A friend recently mentioned about a call she received from a guy's Mummyji:here goes-
Mom: Hi beta, i am xyz's mummy.
Ms sakhi-saheli: namaste aunty ji.
Mom; arrey beta, aapne namaste kaha. aajkal kaun namaste use karta hai( u said namaste, who uses this greeting these days)! so on and so forth.

and then "beta do you wear skirts etc, mera beta abhi US jaane wala hai-to thoda match bhi dekhna hoga na" (my son is going to US soon, so we have to get someone who matches).

and then some have a very practical quest" kya aapke paas H1B ya green card hai"-usually reserved for girls who are either in India or are here on F1 or J1 etc. or some men back home trying to woo women working here in USA in the hope of getting here, nothing wrong with that-but the way they ask is crazy and usually the first thing when they email/call the girl.

one may be a man/lady of few words, but this is really too few! PHEW! "i am tall, athletic guy in city XYZ" or" i am a slim, smart and educated girl"-no details, cliched and no one knows who you are and can be!! and for everything else:will tell you later.



with such proposals, one either laughs or fumes, but i bet you can't ignore them-so enjoy.

anyway, this is a sampler-share some of yours whenever you can :)

Day 1.

Hello folks, am here to share some thoughts with all of you who care to share the same :).

to just say a few words, i am a desi girl in pardes. a scientist by profession and a lot of other things in my own little world-hope to share my lil' rants on desiyana, mind and food.

hope to keep chirping.

Cheers,
me.