Chai and pakode :-D.

Oh, don't go, yet. You haven't reached my food blog, you are doing fine, still on my diary. Its so happens that old habits have prompted me into chirping about something gastronomical (and by the same token, emotional?) :-D.

I have gotten back from having some "chai" and "pakode". This is a combo, that i lighten up my weekend evenings (when not at home) with, quite frequently. Before you decide to feel jealous, let me dash those hopes. In the interest of full disclousre, that "chai" is from Starbucks! and the "pakode", well they are a close cousin, the falafel :-D. . By all means, feel jealous about the latter, because what i just had, are the best falafels ever (and they are served along with the best hummus and very-very hot saunce). And like i said, i get to enjoy those on a rather regular basis. The "chai" however, is a tricky/sticky note here ;).

I know i am making myself available for some criticism here for "enjoying" the Strabucks kinda' chai. Even though i have it quite often, the "chai-tea latte" at Starbucks (or Coffee Bean and Tea Leaf or Pete's Coffee, or at any one of their cousins), isn't remotely like what i know as chai, with or without the masala. A hundred million people have said that before me, and an equal number is more than likely to say so after me. The name "chai-tea" itself creates confusion, exemplified by the following conversation that i had with my ex-colleague and friend AK, who hails from Russia:

Scene: AK and me standing in the line at Starbucks at workplace, waiting to order.

AK: "Musical, i have to ask you something-What is chai?"

That question drew him a strange look from me. Knowing that chai means the same in Russian as it does in Hindi, it sounded a strange question.

Me: Chai means tea in Hindi, and i guess its the same in Russian.

AK: (Big grin on his face) Yeah, true. But then, why do they (Starbucks) list chai separately and not with tea? So may be it is different indeed.

Me: They are trying to use the term chai for their version of the Indian style chai with spices, milk and sugar. Since in India we call it chai, i guess they just have been using that term. But their version is very different from homestyle masala chai.

And AK was happy, having freshly illuminated himself with the difference between "this" chai and "that" chai :-D.

This debate, whether the chai-tea or whatever is worth your $$ and attention or not, will go on. For me, i have a couple of choices, either to go to the local desi restaurant and order a beverage (many a time after waiting atleast for 15 or so minutes) which might match the taste, but may be served at a temperature totally not acceptable :-D or to go to Starbucks, and get some beverage which is not the same taste, but i can get it boiling hot! I choose both, depending on my mood and time :-D. Oh, and while i am at it, i must tell you that i recently discovered some tea bags for "Indian Chai: Classic Indian Chai with exotic sweet spices". Its black tea with spices, which suit my palate perfectly. For once, i don't reall feel the need to add any milk or sugar to this. The aroma is perfect! I wish they would make something similar with green tea as well, and then we can enjoy kahwa too :).

What can i say, i am shameless. I like that name, chai-and while i continue to treat myself to my home made REAL CHAI every weeekend and some weeknights (along with the delish goodness like upma, paranthas and what not), some weekends when i am not at home, and missing my buddies, i let the emotional appeal of that word get the better of me. I miss chirping with MD and Golden Girl over a cup of hot chai, i miss how Ms. Moon demands that her chai should not have any spice in it. And to think of it, i never even had much chai or coffee till i got into Graduate School. Like i have said before, chai and pakodas are the best combo, especially when friends are around :-D. And having a less than optimal "chai", with what i will again describe as the best falafels ever, sounds pretty good on such evenings :-D.

My lil' vacation :)

Here i am, after a long hiatus (or whatever else you may choose to call it) :-D. And its not that i've suddenly come up with a brilliant idea for a post that i am typing something here ;). Still wondering what to write! And while i do that, i will share some tid-bits about my lil' vacation :).

The typical winter time scenary :-D

It cudn't have been any other place, except Golden Girl's, this time. After she moved to the East Coast, our almost daily chai/coffee etc. sessions, where we would share our day-to-day stories came to a halt. So, i just wanted to be with my friend.....and off i went to.....

The Liberty Bell

Philadelphia :).

There's something about the winter skies :)

Besides, its always fun to enjoy a lil' "real" winter ;).

It's sunny, but very cold ;)

And there i was, right there, with my dear friend, again :).

In Philadephia

It always feels like home at her place. It is like a home for me. You know, the place where i can do anything that i can do at my place, including making some chai at my own will, without anyone having to offer me, as in "Please have some chai" etc. :-D. I am not the least bit hesitant at her place. It feels good, when everyone there asks me to make tea for them :). So yes, in more than one ways, i was home for this vacation :).


Besides her Aayi feeding us all the best of goodies, and her daughter playing naughty tricks on me like we had never been away from each other, besides her hubby requesting another cup of tea with all the affection that he could, i got the sheer comfort of being with Golden Girl, the sheer comfort of being with my folks :). We didn't go out much, there really was no need too. Sometimes, you just need to be at home and enjoy.

We did see around a bit in the city of Philadelphia and also took a lil' trip to Pittsburgh.

A view of downtwon Pittsburgh

And on the way back from Pittsburgh,

Ooh, totally lit up :)

we encountered a lil' flurry, which was the only snow i saw.

Pittsburgh is a lovely city, in more than one ways.

Another pretty view of the city

Lovely architecture, so many universities, a decent public transport system-i really liked the place. There's a lil' vista point from where you can have a pretty view of the Pittsburgh downtown and also take a cable car ride on the incline :). And certain things about the city, including the really sharp inclines on the roads (or free roller-coaster rides, according to Golden Girl), reminded everyone of San Francisco :).

You won't believe it, but the only touristy stuff i did in Philly was a cpl. of hours before going to the Airport :-D.

A pretty buggy/carriage

So, Happy New Year everyone (yes, i am wishing everyone after Republic Day!). Will be back with more stories :).

Give me my sourdough :)

Yeah, yeah, as if i could do without talking about food here for long ;). Well, there is no recipe here, and there's a lot more to tell before i get to the "food rant", which makes it suitable for my diary. If you want to snark on the inappropriate title, so be it :-D. So, last week i was away for cpl. of days for a conference near San Francisco. The conference was near a tourist spot, Point Reyes, about one and half hours away from the city. We drove to Point Reyes from San Francisco late in the evening, which meant that we would encounter fog and low visibility. That would only add to the already difficult, serpentine route on highway one :-D.

The Bay Bridge was closed that day, because of the oil spill that everyone has heard about now. We had to make it to the conference by 7:30, because a colleague had her presentation the same day!! After crossing the Golden Gate, we were on our way! While driving through the foggy, dark and very serpentine route, we didn't even realize that we were driving sooooooo close to the ocean!! That realization would set in after a cpl. of day on our ways back, when we would be driving during the day time. This part of highway one is really scenic and gorgeous during the day time, but in a very dizzy way! The many twists and turns can leave one car-sick!

Highway one, on the way back

The conference venue was kinda' obscure.....we missed it, went ahead a cpl. of miles, only to realize that we needed to turn around :-D. This place, as a colleague intutively remarked (which turned out to be an accurate hunch)-was an ex-rehab place!! The place was around a bay, very dark and foggy, just like everywhere else around there, in the night. But we were thrilled to have reached in time, and safely at that! What with a cpl. of deer and a coyote sightings during the drive!


The next morning revealed the true beauty of the place! Lush with pines and wildflowers, it was refreshing! The place is near the sea-shore and has cute lil' trails to explore and enjoy the natural beauty and fresh air! Whatever tiredness (and bitterness) we had gathered from our drive the day before, all melted away!

A big plus about this place was their kitchen! They surely took good care of the vegetarians :-D. I have written here before about how conference usually reserve pasta and salad for vegetarians. Why complain, i will agree with you that conference food in gereal isn't anything good. But here, they had a huge number of choices for breakfast, one vegetarian soup and great bread for lunch and dinner everyday, besides some really well done salads, pastas, vegetables and desserts (except the first day when people felt if the cake was doused, no, make it soaked, in marsala, instead of a gentle drizzle!). I was kinda' thrilled :).


It was nice being San Francisco after a long time, even if that meant mostly driving through the city. I love the city, and i don't mean just the tourist attractions. I love the fact that they have a reasonable public transport system there and a lot of other such things :). No plastic bags, for instance :). And it has something like seasons (compared to Los Angeles) :-D. There's a lot more thats nice and lovely about this city. I just like the place, i love it, actually!

So, on our way back, we stopped at Fisherman's Wharf for lunch-we went to Boudin's. They are known for their sourdough. and i am known for my love for sourdough. i was really hoping something yummy, having had their bread a number of times. All my hopes were dashed when the only vegetarian sandwich on their take-out menu was NOT ON SOURDOUGH! Now you know what made me sour enough to entitle my post thus!! I am not a big fan of cold sandwiches, and the "No sourdough for you" didn't make it anymore pleasant for me :). What made it more painful was the sight of everyone enjoying their breadbowl (well, clam chowder in breadbowl) :-D. My experience during the conference had spolied me into expecting something great :-D. But seriously, was i expecting them to have a fake corn chowder, sans bacon, on their menu, just for people like me ;). Not quite, its Fisherman's Wharf, so naturally the emphasis would be on sea-food. But a sandwich with sourdough wouldn't hurt, though may be, for those (including vegetarians) who visit Fisherman's Wharf for reasons other than having sea-food (which many say isn't great), may be its a decent idea to have some vegetarian soup that can be served in bread bowls :-D. I have to tell you this though, i made myself a nice breadbowl with fake corn chowder soon after i got back home!! ok, not that soon, the next day :-D.

And, to those, who love a breadbowl: please think before ordering one, especially if you don't intend to finish the breadbowl! There's a lot of food wasted, why would you want to contribute to that! Or may be we can have smaller bowls? I told ya, i was gonna' rant ;).

Mind and music :)

Its late in the night. I am waiting for my bus at the bus stop, tired, completely jaded, may be even a bit frustrated.....I reach my bag for the music player. The music begins to flow, into my ears, into my nerves, into my soul.....the same three songs spin again and again, as they have many a time before, soothing my soul, comforting my nerves. As the music plays on, i feel the warmth and brightness of sun, the flakes of snow melting on my skin, the pampering of the breeze.....in my thoughts, i walk with familiar faces in familiar places. i smile, i cry.....i think the thoughts. i walk with a spring in my step, almost dancing. i am in a different place, i am in different places.....these virtual trips to wherever are sponsored courtesy these few songs.....yet again, i travel through time and space: the music, my wings.....

Snap! the music player is off-i am "myself" again, back in the real world.....much soothed and ready to go!
.......................................

Music does it, to me, to everyone. Very true to my name, eh ;). It has got the power to touch the innermost core of human mind. Remember this story, about music? There are many more such stories. Dr. Oliver Sacks has narrated many more stories Musicophilia: Tales of Music and the Brain.

I am really looking forward to reading this one. Dr. Sacks' writings are about human mind and hope, and this one blends a favorite along, music. Check out the following video: Dr. Sacks talks about Music and Parkinsonism:



and this one: "A bolt from the blue", a story about his friend, who developed a passion for music after being struck by lightening!




There are more videos on Musicophilia.com.

And i know, i love me some floating on the cloud of music :).

The diary turns one :)

Yeah! The diary turns one year old today.....it was a year ago, that i began chirping on these pages. The pages that have nurtured me in many ways.....the pages that are a reflection of who i am.

You know the warm and strangely comforting feeling that one derives from turning the pages of an old diary..... The color and the smell of old pages invokes nostalgia.....recreating thoughts, images, feelings.....That is what this diary is for.....

Its really fun reading my own thoughts :). Sometimes it makes me wonder, if i were the person who wrote all that! Really, its fun looking at how my thoughts and feelings have shaped up. The many thoughts that i have poured here, have also sometimes given my friends and me a chance to cherish good old times.....

And the diary has become a space for me to chronicle the books i read, the occassional movies i watch and my holiday trips :).

he he, and did i say that the diary has some dedicated readers too ;). Though most of them refrain from improving the comments statistics on this page (hint, Ms. Moon and MD) :-D.

Few days back, i was wondering if i should be changing the look of my diary. I decided to let it be.....it looks as comforting as a favorite old book, that i'd love to read again and again.....

This may not be a well written blog, it doesn't pretend to be-but its a corner where i can feel cozy :). Now what can be more enjoyable than that :).

I saw a bumble-bee :)

Last week, my friend Swiss-Miss chided me a bit....."You have no life", she chirped! As i chuckled shamelessly, she continued, "You should enjoy life a bit, go out, have some time for yourself. Lets go to Lake Shrine this weekend".

Ah! This was not the first time that she asked me to visit this particular place. To her, this place means a lot. In her words, "Its so serene and peaceful, totally takes the stress of your mind". She always vividly decribes this place and its beauty. After my failed attempts to avoid going there, i finally gave in. I didn't want to upset a friend and given the fact that i was not feeling too well, i decided to take the plunge :).


The lake shrine indeed is a lovely place, with the lush greenery holding a beautiful lake in her lap, and its wears mostly an au naturale look.
Nestled in Pacific Palisades, near Pacific Coast Highway, this place did provide a few moments of calm, what with two lil' falls, a serene lake, swans, a variety of flowers, butterflies and even a bumble bee :). There is a service held in the morning for meditation, according to Swiss-Miss. She usually attends the same on weekends. We went there in the afternoon, so i didn't get to see what it was all about. For us, the main purpose that day was to go out and enjoy. And we did :).

The main reason my friend thought i would like this place is, ofcourse, its Indian roots/connection. The place was founded by Paramhansa Yogananda in 1950 and has Mahatma Gandhi memorial too.

These pictures are not the prettiest, but i enjoyed taking them :). It was quite adventurous though! You are not allowed to talk on your cell phone, and i clicked my pictures with a cell phone camera!! Not that i was talking, but its easy to misinterpret :).


Isn't that a pretty picture :). There were only two swans in the lake and i caught this one at the right moment. The garden is full of beautiful flowers, including roses, which are really fragrant!


And here's the picture that made my day :). A bhanwra/bumble-bee! Hadn't seen one in ages! It was a site to behold!


They even have a small suvenir shop/store. They have a great incense collection, and me being an incense lover, i did indulge a bit :). It is indeed a nice place, and we had a nice outing. After we got back to the University, we had our really late lunch at Elysee. It is a bliss to top it all with a chocolate cheese-cake, i tell you :).

Dreams and the duality of life.....

A cpl. of days back, Ms. Moon and i were chatting online and she happened to share a cpl. of her poems with me.....lovely writings! They really did strike a chord, because in many ways, they reflect my own thoughts too :). One of them talked about dreams.....dreaming with your eyes wide open.....and how they are equally wonderful, as the ones we see while sleeping.....may be even better! Atleast they don't leave us halfway through.....Dreaming at my own will, that sounds fantastic, even reassuring.....as i said, i am a dreamer :).

Its raining outside right now. Raining after a long long time.....The weather has changed so much since the bright and crisp morning.....and so have my feelings.....Swinging between hope and thoughtlessness, i have suddenly found my ground.....and i know, its okay to dream.....as i said, i am very much a dreamer.....i dream about reality.....

..............

That is an oxymoron.....Well, life presents you with lots of duality.....we just need to let go and accept this duality :).

Few days back, i was waiting at the bus-stop.....completely tired, and completely hopeless.....figuratively and literally.....i tried to cheer myself up by engaging in small talk with a cpl. of students who enquired about a bus schedule. They had been waiting for a long time. Finally their bus arrived.....they left, with a smile. Smiles are infectious, i smiled too :). And then, i noticed something.....A poor, homeless man was picking through the trash. That is an everyday thing, they sometimes pick out plastic bottles, cans etc, i thought. But this was different.....he picked out two huge plastic cups, almost filled and drank up the soda greedily.....as a tear rolled down my cheek, the homeless guy burst into a nervous laughter.....Was he happy? I don't know, i won't know.....but i learnt that life is all about living on.....i tucked my small worries and tensions into a tiny pocket in my mind.....my bus had arrived.....

Away from oneself :)

Oh! This is not some sad poetic reference for me being away from the diary for quite some time :). And you'd rather not get me started on that! There's already plenty of "i am lazy"' "i post only when i really feel like" stuff in the earlier posts ;). This one is about taking a real trip out of your own self and floating free :-D. Brought to my inbox courtesy dear buddy MD.

Few days back MD mailed to me about a cpl. of articles published in Science, about out of body experiences. We have all heard stories of people claiming that they had an out of body experience. Till recently such experiences were thought be either figments of someone's imagination or a result of treating yourself with hallucinogenic chemicals! However, things have been changing. Rick Strassmann proposes that in natural states, body's own hallucinogens such as DMT can trick one into an out of the body experience. And finally, there are these papers now, which describe how, without even taking any help from endogenous or exogenous hallucinogens, you can trick your mind/brain axis into having an out of the body experience! Finally, a more scientific and humane look! The authors basically have aimed at "disrupting the spatial unity between self and body" to quote them.

Read more about it here.

The experiments involved use of head-mounted video displays and manipulated the sense of touch to create such an experience. The subjects were made to see their own backs using the video displays and by manipulating the touch, they were made to feel out of the body!

For one of the studies, a team led by Bigna Lenggenhager and Olaf Blanke, both of the Swiss Federal Institute of Technology in Lausanne, asked people to stand in front of a camera while wearing video-display goggles. In one experiment, subjects saw the camera's view of their own back, computer-enhanced to create a three-dimensional "virtual own body." When the subjects' backs were stroked with a highlighter pen at the same time they saw their virtual back being stroked, they reported that the sensation seemed to be caused by the highlighter on their virtual back, making them feel as if the virtual body was in fact their own body.

Adopting a similar strategy to attempt to induce out-of-body experiences, Henrik Ehrsson of the Karolinska Institute in Stockholm, Sweden, asked men and women to sit in a chair and don a video headset connected to two cameras that provided a stereoscopic view of their backs. As a subject viewed his or her own back from behind, Ehrsson used two plastic rods to simultaneously stroke the subject's chest and a location behind the subject's back. Although people felt the rubbing on their chest, in the headset they could only see Ehrsson's arm moving behind their back, reinforcing the sense that they were sitting at a location behind their actual body. The experience often elicited surprised giggles, says Ehrsson, who has tried it out himself. "You really feel that you are sitting in a different place in the room and you're looking at this thing in front of you that looks like yourself and you know it's yourself but it doesn't feel like yourself," he says. "It's almost like you're looking at a dummy." Nearly all subjects reported similar impressions on a questionnaire.

Brilliant, really! These studies remind me of the famous experiments by V. S. Ramachandran, who used mirror-image experiments with body-image, when he tricked the mind of the patients to cure phantom limb pain and tried the same for mirror agnosia and made the patients feel that the object they were asked to grab was within the mirror!

What's there in a name!

The answer is: 21 million dollars! As ridiculous as it may sound, but yes, the worth of art is measured by the name who possibly created it! That's the real world, my dear!

Few days back, it was found that a painting titled "Head of a Man", which since long had been marketed as a work of Van Gogh, and was apparently worth 21 million dollars, was actually not his work.....Fair enough. But what gets me is the sentence that has usually been following this news bite everywhere: that the painting is no more worth the prized amount!! Thankfully, WaPo has this redeeming quote from Gerard Vaughan in their coverage:

"It is very important to make the point that it's not a forgery," he told reporters. "There is no evidence to suggest that someone produced this picture ... to pass it off as a work by Van Gogh."

Valuing a work of art by just the "name" of the artist? Art appreciation assumes a totally new dimension!!

Wonderland and the old dreams.....

Few days back i finished this book "Hard boiled wonderland and the end of the world", a very surreal book by Haruki Murakami, my first book by this author. The book is too true to the title, and i don't mean it in a negative sense at all. It narrates two stories, from two distinct worlds. On on hand you have the really modern, fast paced wonderland and the other one is, well, the end of the world! The wonderland story is all about information wars, the strange new ways of protecting information, which use the most sophisticated device of all times: the human unconscious mind.....this world is not as simple as it looks! While the story in the wonderland is all about mind, the end of the world allows its citizens in only on one condition: that you have to surrender your shadow, the mind! The shadow then wilts away at some point, and that makes you a true citizen of the end of the world.....and while the shadow awaits its end, you would read old dreams: the broken pieces of mind and memory.....which ones belonged to someone.....

Two stories, two worlds, one connect!

Two sides of the brain, working independently?

Two minds within one?

Sounds lovely? Yes, it does! And that precisely is the surreal feeling i enjoyed the book for. The narrative is psychedelic, almost like a feverish dream! The only distractions to me, were, some of the lead character's obsessions (you'll know what i meant, when you read the book!) and the really show piece like female characters! The book could do without them (but thats my opinion). But you can easily ignore all that, and just enjoy the journey into these two worlds.....

The book has some crazy sounding, but interesting thoughts on mind! The author surely is fascinated with human mind.

The book has no ending.....or does it? You decide what to call it.....to me, it was an image of the beginning.....

and i think of Alice in the Wonderland.....

She likes it ;).

Ms. Moon, my dear dear friend, recently announced that she likes this diary blog better :). While many of you many not agree with her, i perfectly understand her reasons for this verdict :)). Its always more enjoyable when you know a bit of the backstory, eh? What say Ms. Moon :)). After all this blog has all those cups of chai, chit-chat and Boston stories.

While it is interesting to share what goes in my plate, for me its equal fun to write what goes on in my mind.....and that sort of nudges me to look at the posting stats! One post a month!! My inner voice says, "Sharam Kar" (have some shame)! where have i been! and i promised to Ms. Moon not to proclaim myself lazy anymore :)). So take it as those pages of the diary which remain empty, because there was too much to say.....or may be just nothing. How else do you describe emptiness.....Oh well, moving is a part of life.....Golden Girl has headed eastwards.....MD back to Europe.....One moment so full and the next one hollow! Takes time to reassure oneself that they are still there with me.....in thoughts, and yes, on Gchat and Skype ;).

Its funny, this whole definition of being close! Ms. Moon and i chat almost everyday even as we go about living in different continents. But while i was home, we hardly got a chance to talk much!! So draw your own conclusions :)).

And yes, not to leave you in this web of words, i present you with some pictures, for your viewing pleasure.....Enjoy :).

He remembered music and love.....

This is the story of man who, while forgetting most of the things due to his amnesia, remembered two things: Music and Love.....A WNYC mp3 on the life story of Mr. Clive Wearing, narrated by Debrah Wearing (his wife) and Dr. Oilver Sacks.



The whole story is amazing.....I have a feeling that this is gonna' be a part of his forthcoming book "Musicophilia: Tales of Music and the Brain".

Summer time and a trip :)

Aha! i am here again! i won't repeat myself by calling myself lazy and such ;). its for the world to see :)). but there are reasons other than laziness for not showing up here for sometime! reasons, as warm and wonderful as a trip home, after three long years. A trip that packed a whole lot of goodies for me in a span of a lil' more than two weeks.....way more exciting than a roller-coaster ride :). Quite on the lines of a good, hearty and flavorful meal, which has all the ingredients and spices ;).

The joy that i felt holding the new additions to the family, my niece (my sister's daughter) and my nephew (my brother's son), in my arms.....i had been hearing from everyone how much my niece reminded them of me.....and indeed in many simple, subtle ways she is quite like me and i am thrilled that we hit it off instantly :)). Its strange and heartwarming how she reminds my sister and me of each other.....I find her smile and eyes like my sister and my sister in turn finds her looks to be like mine.....My nephew, on the other hand, is naughty, just like his father ;).

In them, the kids, we look for reflections.....reflections of our own childhood.....when things with apparently simple (only apparently, because i believe its not easy being a few months old, being totally dependent on someone, going through teething, ear-infections and such.....and not even being able to tell anyone, it just seems easy now, because we don't remember any of it! ).

Reflections there are, aplenty.....even when we sometimes look at ourselves in the mirror, we find reflections of our loved ones.....our parents and grandparents.....reflections, that reassure us that there is always someone with us.....

Yes, after three long years, i was home.....and then, it was like i had never been away.....


Still tingling with the crispness of summer sun , still feeling the comfort of evening breeze.....

Thoughts :)

I have been away for long!! and never imagined that i would do so ;). May be i was just being lazy. I have recently equated myself with Garfield :)). But hey, i have really gotten that lazy to not even type a single word over here for one full month! Irritating and amusing at the same time. Or is it because i didn't have much to say. Not true, cuz' there's been a lot that i felt like writing. Probably i published those posts in my dreams ;).



Recently, a very very dear friend of mine Ms. Affection visited me. Actually she was in the city for a conference so we met up quite a bit. it was fun, good fun. We have known each other since M. Sc. days :). I didn't get to show her around much (as if i myself have seen the city a lot), but we did go to a cpl. of my favorite spots, including The Third Street Promenade and the Santa Monica Beach :). And we enjoyed every bit of it, including the lil' ride on the Ferris Wheel after a long time! Its good to be childish sometime :)).


Also, inbetween i had to take cabs a cpl. of times. There's a certain cab company based in Beverly Hills which usually is very reliable. The first thing (or one of the first things) that i got asked after i got inside cab was "Miss, are you from India". The cab drivers, both elderly gentlemen asked this really endearingly. And while we chatted on the bad traffic on 405 and so on, it turned out that both of them were of Armenian origin. Infact, majority of the employees in the said cab company are of Armenian origin. These two gentlemen had daughters my age and had really sound knowledge of India and also "Bollywood" errrr.....Hindi movies! One of them asked me if Zeeta was a very popular Indian name. When i told him that i hadn't heard of this name before, he asked me if Geeta was popular. And i suddenly felt illuminated about what he was trying to say. He was referring to the popular Hema Mailini movie "Seeta aur Geeta" :). The other gentleman talked a lot about his daughter and other kids her age.

He said he felt good that i was so polite and respectful to him and then narrated a horiifying incident on how two young ladies his daughter's age, took the cab and didn't pay him and threatened him!! I had to believe him because he clearly sounded shaken as he spoke about it.....he was grateful though, that the next day when he went to the hotel where he had dropped them the previous night, those two kids were found creating problems in the hotel and given their due. His thoughts on having your roots in a certain place were also very touching.....in his own words, "You belong to place because you were born there, you learnt the basics of life there.....but you also belong to the place where you set up your shop, make your home and babies, see them grow up, the place where you turn from a young guy to a Grandpa, the place you pay your bills and taxes, the place that gives you food, fruits and water....."

Tickling: self vs. non-self :)

Jay Leno might think that its really ridiculous for a John Hopkins team to study why one can not tickle oneself, while there are bigger health reltaed issues facing man-kind. But this one got me thinking.....after all, its tactile impulse that the neurons receive. How does the brain figure out that it is self tickling and thus there is no need to jump etc ;). Our brain is smart, wired so, that we don't jump each time there is a self tactile pressure. When one tries to self tickle, the brain knows where and how the tactile impulse is moving, because its your own fingers generating that impulse. But for non-self tickling, its always a suspense! The brain can not track whats going to happen next, an alarm is set off and there you are, tickle tickle, giggle giggle :).

Apparently its our cerebellum that can distinguisgh between expected (self) and un-expected sensations (Original research article). Upon self-tickling, the cerebellum can signal somatosensory cortex of the brain on what sensation to expect, and this dampens the tickling sensation. Also, to quote from Robert Provine's article:

Tickle, an ancient laughter stimulus, is a means of communication between preverbal infants and mothers, and between friends, family, and lovers. Because you cannot tickle yourself, tickle involves a neurological self/nonself discrimination, providing the most primitive social scenario.

Its interesting how our brain is wired to distinguish between self and non-self: and isn't that the first line of defense.

Reign over me.....

This Friday i went for a movie-my first movie in a theater this year, and the first one after MD left for Europe.....We always wanted to see a movie in the CREST theater, which usually screen good indie movies and has a nice decor.....but somehow couldn't make it! But finally, i got to see a movie in this glittering theater.....

An old photo of CREST theater

By now, you all must be knowing what this movie "Reign over me" is all about. About someone having gone through a loss, leading to a total disconnect from the world around. About tragedy invoking denial.....and denial it is.....a strong one at that. Charlie Fineman shuts all the doors on any thoughts from his past, after a tragedy (or rather the tragedy).....He's living in a cocoon, if living is a suitable word here. With the ear-phones on perpetually, he moves about the streets of NewYork City on his trolley scooter, plays video games like there's no tomorrow, does few things obsessively and tries to escape by watching Mel Brooks flicks. All in a hope, that he can escape-a hope that makes him shun anyone who has anything to do with his past. His flight response, his denial is so over-powering that he refuses to recognize any kind of loss, be it his own, or a friend's. Yes, after years of living in a cocoon, he does find someone he opens upto-solely because the person doesn't have much clue about his past.....

There's no Adam Sandler in this movie-i only saw Charlie.....i am not willing to believe that Charlie is not real. He's very much there, there are many Charlies in this world..... His eyes don't meet yours, he mumbles a lot, he's as blank as empty space.....and the fact that i was watching this movie with someone who lost a dear one in the same tragedy in real life, and the familiar looking places from New York City, which very often made the backdrop, didn't make it any easier......i am notorious for shedding tears while watching movie-i even cry during penguin flicks-but this was something different.....something hit me real hard-its hard to explain what it could be.....especially in a particular incident when Charlie's friend suffers a loss, and all Charlie says is , "lets get breakfast", followed by some more gibbrish.....how hollow and drained can anyone get in pain..... but i have to remind myself that this is just a movie.....

Charlie, the near reality and the rest of the movie.....and i guess i should talk more about the latter. Don Cheadle, who plays Charlie's friend, and a dentist, is good and Liv Tyler (the shrink) quite OK. But the movie does have a perpetual irritant.....the character of the dentist's patient-she's really irritating.....But the movie owes a lot to Charlie. They say its Adam Sandler-the same guy who does movies like "Click", i say the movie has only Charlie, a real, believable person.....and any comments on him being a cross of Bob Dylan (for looks) and Rain man (for personality) are not well taken! Mike Binder, the director does a fair job in building Charlie' character, though the movie could have done away with some irritants.....You can read his interview here.

Go, meet Charlie-this is one more story to tell us about the tricks mind plays on us.

Something yummy awaits you :)

Dear readers,

You know that i never leave an opportunity to talk about food-so this time i went whole hog! Yes, i made myself a lil' online food-corner. And my chirps in this diary continue as usual :).

Hope you are all having a good time.

Cheers,
musical.

Reading Sybil.....

I finished reading "Sybil"-a book by Flora Rheta Schreiber, last week. This book had been on to-read list for years.....but having read the reviews, i could never summon enough courage to read it. I finally did, early this year.....

The book is about a girl Sybil Isabel Dorsett, who suffered from Multiple Personality Disorder-based on the life of a real person-Shirley Ardell Mason. Multiple Personality Disorder is a condition where you have a conscious waking self and the other alternate selves who rise from the subconscious/unconscious mind.....and the waking self has no clue of their existence.

Sybil, who first dissociated into her waking self and an alternate self at a young age of 2-3 years, had no less than 16 selves of different ages who inhabited her being.....two of them being males! This is touted to be the most complex of such cases. Sybil found herself united into one whole being in her 40s, after she went through a whole series of psychoanalyses-some based in hypnosis and sodium pentothal (the truth injection).....Her dissociations apparently originated as a defense to protect herself from the childhood abuse.....and that, to me, was the toughest part of the book.....the other possible cause being the conflicting religious values she faced.

In the book you meet Sybil and 16 selves, her parents, her room-mate Teddy Reeves, her psychiatrist Dr. Cornelia Wibur and even the author of the book. Her 16 beings are different from each other.....the volatile Peggy(s), the French sophisticate Vicky, the baby like Ruthie, Vanessa, Marcia, Helen, Marjorie, Nancy, Mary, the guys Mike and SID (after Sybil's initials), the un-named blonde and Sybil, as her waking self. Each with different desires and skills, each a fragment of what were to be the whole Sybil. Sybil was a really good artist.....some of her sketches are provided in the book-different selves preferred different style of painting.....some of her works can be viewed in this link.

There has been some controversy on whether Sybil was a multiple personality or an extreme case of hysteria. It is said that Dr. Cornelia Wilbur delibrately induced personalities in her patient during hypnosis.....and that it had something to do with the book deal. More details on this controversy can be read here. Shirley A. Mason, Cornelia Wilbur and Flora Rheta Schreiber are no more in this world to share the truth.....Apparently, Dr. Cornelia Wilbur's archives and notes were to be opened in 2005. May be that would bring some facts to light.

The book scores, whether as a work of pure fact or part fact-part fiction, am not sure. If its fact, then its one of the most complicated tales of human psychology and if fiction, then its imaginative! The book is reptitive at times, but only to underscore Sybil's trials and tribulations. The description of her selves is rather vivid and you connect and empathise with each of them.....and you are sure to miss them after the book is over. The pages dedicated to childhood abuse are graphic.....very painful, and i admit, i skipped through those partly.....it was too difficult to take.

Sybil gleefully enjoys her days being all for herself, after all her selves have been united.....on how she can do simple things all by herself, without another person from within taking over her.....

And in this respect, it gives a message similar to many of Oliver Sacks' works- We have a lot in life to be thankful for.....simple things that we don't even think about.....Like being one with ourselves.....

Yeh hai Cricket!

I guess its high time i should detach myself completely from Cricket! i know, i have been telling this to myself since years now.....what with all the match-fixing and the politics ridden scenario of Indian Cricket. But then, the game is far too enticing to avoid.....and like many an enticing thing, this one often leads to heart-break!!

Y'day, during our weekend chirping, no sooner did MD start whispering a few words about India-B'desh match, i began lecturing her on why i am not opening any of the web-pages that provide live coverage of the game. This, much to her chagrin! And then.....half way through our conversation and after hearing repeatedly from her about the dismal score, i got into the trap! yes, i was fervently refreshing the pages.....and i don't need to tell you how it ended. But, kudos to the Bangladesh team-they played real well.....

The results implied fans being upset, really really upset. A cpl. of days back dear ladies exchanged this friendly banter on which Rahul rules: Rahul Sharma or Rahul Dravid.....Bee, who was rooting for Dravid is now finding Gollum hotter than him! See, we girls have more than one reason for being upset. and may be guys too.....atleast those who paid for channels showing the World Cup! (sorry, i don't any girls who have subscribed for the said channels-good sense prevails sometimes).

ab aur hum kya kahein.....this is one time i am really tutoring myself to abstain ;). ah! the trap that Cricket is.....

and our historical arch-rivals didn't well either.....On a more upsetting note, y'day's events have been followed with something really sad.....

Yeh hai Cricket.....enticing, heart-breaking, addictive.....

Am bracing myself to fall into the trap for the next game!

Chirp chirp.....

Right this moment.....

The weather outside is bright and crisp, typical of SoCal. and i want my share of this brightness. Dhoop, this brightness is so soothing. remember that song, "kachhi dhoop, kunkuni dhoop".....its quite fun to chirp with your friends on a bright, sunny day. Bring in some chai and snacks, and its bliss :).

i spoke to Ms. Doll Wednesday night, and we exchanged the ritualistic weather trivia as well :). Kinda' crazy that while she was freezing, last weekend SoCal had record high temperatures! it had us both in splits. whats worse is that she craved for ice-cream as i longed for a hot cuppa' chai!!

and y'day i caught up with Ms. Moon and Ms. Wisdom on the chat. i often chat with Ms. Moon, but to find Wisdom online is bit of a rarity. i wrote a hello to them both. and while is was chatting with Ms. Wisdom i infomred her about my two-timing ;). Its so turned out that Moon and Wisdom were also two-timing me, they were chatting amongst themselves too :)). Girls, can anyone stop them from chattering ;).

hmm, and then there are those weekend chats with MD, its always like the good old times, when we would sit and chirp over a chai.

Oh, and meeting Golden girl over coffee sometimes and what do we do-Chirp :)).

This chirping makes us what we are, giving us a chance to connect with others, sharing thoughts and ideas.....helping each other grow.....